Being Bullied for Your Personal Style Is Never Cool, at Any Age

Funky Notes | Wear What The FUNK You Want

Have you ever been called ugly or made fun of because of something you wore?

I have, and it's funny how some childhood memories stay with you no matter how old you get.

Growing up, my mother always knew how to put an outfit together. She could take secondhand clothes and make them look really nice. But me, I had my own little ideas about what I wanted to wear, and half the time she didn't even know I was cutting up stuff.

I've always tried to make something out of something. As a kid, I was cutting up clothes, gluing things together, adding little pieces here and there because in my mind, I could see something different. I really did!

Now, whether anybody else understood what I was doing was another story.

And yes, I got laughed at and made fun of for some of the things I wore.

I think when you're a child, you don't always understand why somebody would make fun of something you enjoy. You're just being yourself, doing what makes you happy, and then somebody comes along and makes you feel embarrassed about it.

And sometimes that embarrassment stays with you.

I know it did with me because there were things I stopped doing creatively years ago. So when I talk about being bullied, I'm not speaking as somebody who went through it and just brushed everything off. It affected me.

But there's another part of this that I've never really talked about.

Years later, I found myself watching my youngest daughter go through bullying, too.

And you know, I really thought that by moving into a nicer area and sending my children to better schools, maybe I wouldn't have to deal with some of the things I went through growing up.

I don't know why I thought that would make such a difference, but I did.

I guess in my mind, I thought a different environment meant a different experience for my children. Maybe I wouldn't have to revisit those old memories, and maybe they wouldn't have to experience some of the things I did.

But little did I know I was about to learn something all over again.

Bullying doesn't care where you live, what school your child attends, or how nice the neighborhood looks.

And watching my daughter go through it was something I never imagined having to deal with again, especially as a mother.

I've never really talked about that part of our lives, and I'm not going to get into everything because that's her personal experience. But I can talk about what it was like for me, having been that little girl who was bullied and then growing up to watch my own child experience it.

It made me look at a lot of things differently.

And that's why I say bullying is never acceptable, no matter what the reason is or how old somebody happens to be.

Now, when it comes to personal style, I see so many conversations about what people should wear, what they shouldn't wear, what's fashionable, what's outdated, and what's appropriate once you reach a certain age.

And sometimes I just sit back and wonder why we spend so much time worrying about what somebody else has on.

Some people love luxury brands, some enjoy simple clothes, and others like shopping secondhand or putting together things that might look a little weird to somebody else.

Honey, isn't that the whole point of having your own personal style?

Designer clothes, secondhand finds, or handmade pieces don't define a person's worth, and none of those things makes somebody better than the next person.

I've always felt that what somebody chooses to wear is part of their personal space. It's their choice, their money, their body, and their own way of expressing themselves.

And just because we get older doesn't mean people stop making fun of each other.

I've seen grown people make jokes about somebody's outfit, criticize what a woman wears because of her age, or even take pictures of strangers and put them online just so other people can laugh.

And I always wonder how that person would feel if they came across those comments.

We don't know what somebody has been through or what it took for them to finally feel comfortable wearing something they enjoy.

That's one of the reasons my Bully-Free Style Zone means so much to me.

When I started Funky Grunge Boutique and began creating my Ugly Denim Bags, I already knew everybody wasn't going to like them.

And that's perfectly fine with me. #realtalk

My bags are different, and they come from those same childhood ideas I had years ago when I was cutting up clothes and trying to make something out of whatever I could find.

But here's the thing: just because somebody doesn't like my bags doesn't mean they have to make fun of them, and just because I wouldn't wear something another person loves doesn't mean I need to make them feel bad about it either.

That's what I want people to understand about the Bully-Free Style Zone and my Wear What The FUNK You Want movement.

It's not about everybody dressing funky or wearing unusual things. It's about respecting somebody who enjoys a simple T-shirt and jeans just as much as somebody who loves designer clothes, secondhand finds, or making their own pieces.

There's room for all of us. And that's on every FUNKY thang!

And I think sometimes we forget that you can have your own opinion without making somebody else feel embarrassed about theirs.

I know what being bullied did to me as a child, and I know what it felt like watching my daughter go through it years later. So this is something I don't take lightly.

Whether you're 15, 35, 55, or 75, nobody deserves to be bullied because of how they look, what they wear, or simply because somebody thinks they're different.

So if you enjoy dressing simple, enjoy it. If you love luxury, enjoy that too. And if you're somebody who likes putting together things that other people might consider a little weird, well, enjoy that too.

Just remember to give somebody else that same respect.

Because we all have our own personal style, and nobody should have to feel bad about theirs.

Wear What The FUNK You Want.

Thank you for hanging out with me.

Tangie
Funky Grunge Boutique

Let's Talk: Have you ever been called ugly or bullied for your personal style? If you're comfortable sharing, I'd love to hear your experience.

If you'd like to see what I've been creating, you can browse my ready-to-ship Ugly Denim Bags. And if you enjoy making your own pieces, take a look at my bag tutorials.